I have to constantly remind myself that happiness isn’t the only healthy emotion.
My anger, anxiety, sadness, and other “negative” emotions all tell me about ways I can find meaning in my life.
The problem isn’t that I feel these things. The problem is that I don’t listen very well.
My anger asks me to take action and protect what’s important. But when I pay attention, I often find that I’m more anxious than angry.
My anxiety asks me to investigate what is unknown and prepare for possible challenges. But when I don’t listen to it, I often lash out with aggression instead of preparing.
My sadness asks me to share appreciation and honor for what I’ve lost. But when I don’t listen, I often withdraw into isolation instead of sharing.
When I try to change how I feel instead of listening to it, I often do the exact opposite of what is needed. So, the emotion pushes back even stronger to get my attention.
As the psychologist Carl Jung said “what you resist, persists”.
On the other hand, when I listen closely and answer the actual need, the negative emotion dissolves into fulfillment, purpose, and meaning – and even happiness.